I’m not here to affect you politically or …– Stephen Colbert
I’m not here to affect you politically or socially. I’m here to make you laugh. I use the news as the palette for my jokes.
My brother Billy was the joke teller…– Stephen Colbert
My brother Billy was the joke teller. My brother Jim had a really sharp, cutting wit. And the teller of long stories, that was my brother Ed. As a child, I just absorbed everything they said, and I was always in competition for the laughs.
I’ve been accused of being unambitious…– Stephen Colbert
I’ve been accused of being unambitious, but what I do takes up every minute. I’m executive producer, I’m a writer and the host.
I don’t accept the status quo…– Stephen Colbert
I don’t accept the status quo. I do accept Visa, MasterCard, or American Express.
I love ‘Sunday in the Park with George…– Stephen Colbert
I love ‘Sunday in the Park with George.’ I saw that when I was just, just starting theater school, and I remember singing ‘Finishing the Hat’ or at least reading the lyrics to ‘Finishing the Hat’ and other songs from ‘Sunday in the Park with George’ to my mom to try to explain why I […]
Northwestern’s alumni list is truly impressive…– Stephen Colbert
Northwestern’s alumni list is truly impressive. This university has graduated best-selling authors, Olympians, presidential candidates, Grammy winners, Peabody winners, Emmy winners, and that’s just me!
Cynicism masquerades as wisdom…– Stephen Colbert
Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the furthest thing from it. Because cynics don’t learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness: a rejection of the world because we are afraid it will hurt us or disappoint us. Cynics always say ‘no.’ But saying ‘yes’ begins things. Saying ‘yes’ is how things grow.
If I had free time to go to Los Angeles to shoot a …– Stephen Colbert
If I had free time to go to Los Angeles to shoot a movie, I would rather spend it with my kids.
The truthiness is, anyone can read the news to …– Stephen Colbert
The truthiness is, anyone can read the news to you. I promise to feel the news ‘at’ you.
I would say laughter is the best medicine…– Stephen Colbert
I would say laughter is the best medicine. But it’s more than that. It’s an entire regime of antibiotics and steroids. Laughter brings the swelling down on our national psyche and then applies an antibiotic cream. You gotta keep it away from your eyes.